"...it works best for me to decide that the pieces that show up really
do fit together in the most pleasing way imaginable."
I awoke feeling like a stranger in my own bed. Yesterday my partner
bought a new throw for the bed after deciding unilaterally, that the comforter
that I moved in with was not to his liking. Actually, I've known
this for quite awhile -- since I first put it on the bed. It was
too light both in weight and color. I had to agree. It wasn't
a big favorite when I received it as a gift for Christmas.
My first reaction on opening the gift was to remark, "They really don't
have a clue what I like at all." Yet, the comforter set became
the anchor for my first decorating project, my guest bedroom. The
whole project worked like this. When the paint for the guest bathroom
turned out to be a very different color than it looked in the store, I
discovered that the color worked well with the comforter set. Suddenly
I had my anchor color scheme for the room. Little by little I added
touches like the bedside table with the fou fouey ruffle on the bottom.
I'm not a ruffley type but the color worked and with a lace top it looked
nice. Add a picture from the starving artist's sale -- nice colors
in a very cold wintery mountain scene -- and the room was complete.
Even the ugly lamp given us by my in-laws fit nicely into the scheme.
And, voila, there it was, my first completely decorated room. Although
it wasn't like I'd envisioned it might be, and I didn't follow the process
I thought I 'should' to decorate, it worked quite nicely.
This isn't much different from most of the projects I've known.
I usually expect them to be nicely planned out -- the equivalent of color
swatches, of all the 'right' colors, styles and accesories picked out in
advance with everything my imagination can conjure up readily available,
affordable, and done on time. They never turn out that way.
The colors don't quite live up to my imagination. The styles, if
they are available, are not accessible or affordable. It usually
happens more like my guest bedroom. It starts with a few pieces
provided with the best of intention. I find the heart in those pieces
that weren't quite what I expected, and add more bits and pieces as they
show up into the world of the project. The end the project produces
rarely looks like what I'd envisioned. It most often works marvelously,
and by the time I'm done, I'm attached to all the pieces that weren't at
all what I'd expected.
I could choose a different interpretation. I could refuse to use
pieces that don't fit into my scheme of what 'ought to' be. When
I do that I wind up stuck and not able to make any progress because the
'right' pieces just never do seem to show up. I could progress with
what the universe provides and curse the project every step of the way
deciding over and over again what a disappointing project it really is.
In the end, it works best for me to decide that the pieces that show
up really do fit together in the most pleasing way imaginable. It
works best for me and it works best for the pieces. In my projects
those pieces are most often people and it works best for all of us if I
decide to be pleased rather than disappointed. I discover the harmonies
initially unheard, the subtleties previously hidden, and riches once
mined and never after lost. And I discover, later, that I can hardly
part with that comforter that I didn't think I liked originally.