Indecision
Odilon Redon: Profile of Shadow (c. 1895)
"I'm still not doing anything except not deciding yet."
Growing up in the Inland Northwest provided ample opportunity for me to study the fine art of Indecision. I've seen innumerable books touting The Art Of Decision-Making, but I've seen none promoting its equally important opposite, for Indecision seems every bit as essential, if not more so, as its counterpart. Here, for instance, the winter weather patterns offer almost endless Indecision points. The Muse and I were planning to drive to the state's Western side. Which route should we take? In November, the mountain pass route rarely seems the best choice, for capricious snows and such complicate passage. The alternate route, down the vaunted Columbia Gorge, also offers complications with notorious winds and frequent weather changes. Two days out, Indecision rules, and while it might seem necessary to—just Decide, already!—the tenets of Indecision counsel otherwise.
In this culture, Indecision is widely considered the eighth mortal sin, following and resembling sloth, for Indecision seems like nothing, and nothing's never considered a viable choice. In this culture, we pride ourselves upon always being up to something. We do rather than overthink a response. We value decisiveness almost above every other virtue, but any value held in such reverence carries a curse. Yes, there exists a state characterized as overly decisive, and it can prove to be a deadly habit. Choices should be made when necessary, but choices taken out of mere habit might just as well be considered capricious, for they will necessarily lack sufficient purpose to render them much more than useless. Better to natter sometimes and wait for that sublime moment when the decision might benefit from greater focus.
But won't we curse ourselves with aimless wandering if we aren't decisive? Not all who wander are anything like lost. Many are gathering additional information before committing, and others seem sanguinely satisfied without a discernible course heading. Some, too, are deliberately lost under the aegis that getting lost provides one of the very best premises within which to get found. Looking around, Indecision has its benefits and should properly remain one of the choices whenever a decision point appears. I counsel myself to hasten most slowly then, when a choice point comes into focus, for I could be too easily goaded into decisive action when idleness might be preferred. There never were any Jonses I needed to keep up with, and this only really was a competition when I insisted it was, often then to my own detriment. We primarily play a solo game and might make whatever choice suits us if only we were better in touch with what 'us' wanted at that moment.
I play alternate scenarios while I engage in apparent Indecision. My judgment’s not idling but working overtime then. I concoct differing plotlines and often discover choices that were not at all apparent at first or second glance. If the snow comes as predicted, we might cancel the first part of our excursion, for we don't need a long drive through a snowstorm. Better for everyone involved if we defer. Choices proliferate as I consider alternates. In general, Indecision depends upon the Law of Infinite Choice to succeed. The longer I defer a decision, the greater the number of alternate solutions might emerge. From that eventual sea of choices, one or two not initially apparent might well come to the fore. They usually do. Then, the benefits of Indecision finally appear. Decisiveness deferred often becomes choices more strongly preferred, so delight often lurks beyond the world of immediate decisiveness. Delight deferred often becomes greater delight after.
It's hard work, though, actively not deciding for a change. In the old days, I could dispatch a dilemma and justify the resulting complications under the guise of at least having been decisive. However, decisiveness itself does not necessarily defend against negative externalities. The root cause of most of the complications in this world lies in defaulting to decisiveness. A slight deferral often improves the quality of a decision by reducing the volume of unforeseen consequences. One's not merely idling while fretting but foreseeing instead of acting. The scenarios seen while calculating alternate routes tend to pay big dividends in complications later avoided and thereby never encountered. The Muse declares a desired route and leaves it to me to bring doubt into consideration, for I'm a native here in a country tailor-made for Indecision. I might almost master it by now, though I do not know how to demonstrate my skill. It just looks like I'm still not doing anything except not deciding yet.
©2023 by David A. Schmaltz - all rights reserved